Booming Banter

Y’all know that I’m terribly allergic to Pitties.

Well since I’ve had my haircut it has become abundantly apparent that I also have some other issues.

My eyes are all runny.

Ma suspects ragweed that causes her to gunk up, Dad to cough and Auntie Denise to sneeze.

It’s everywhere at present.

It’s funny though that one eye is always worse than the other. It gets so bad it glazes over!

Why would that be?

Do we all have a side that is the weaker one?

I’m praying for rain to wash some of this dust from the air.

In the meantime I’ll suffer in silence as always and rely on Ma to make me presentable.

Blessing#2178-Touch Ups

Precious Peeps Pits Perfect here to propel you into this wonderful weekend.

It has been hot as hades here. Dad says it’s worse than New Delhi!

Granny is good as gold and tries to get us out early but when we come home I have to eat an ice bucket.

It’s days like these when I wish we had a pool.

I can just imagine how fun it would be to plunge in.

We do have a dog beach close by but Granny won’t go because of the mosquitoes. Says she’s not risking west Nile even if I do resemble Cleopatra.

So I guess I’ll just guzzle a little more “glace”

Blessing#2177-Popsicles

So you know that plant that inspired the invention of Velcro well it nearly did me in.

I had an encounter with it while sniffing out coyotes in our woods on the way to the park.

My ears got stuck together and I looked like Julius Caesar wearing his laurels. It even got wrapped around my chops.

Of course Ma set to removing it but there was a full branch of the buds tangle in my tufts.

It was agony.

I drew my lip back and threatened to nip her before taking off to my hiding place.

She persisted though every chance she got.

Man it was painful.

Finally after two days of torture she gave up and for the last two imbedded lumps took out the scissors.

I tell y’all not since the crown of thorns has anything been more awful.

Fortunately Auntie Denise has now been briefed to blaze the trail ahead of us and look out for the monster material.

Never again do I wish to endure such torment. .

Blessing#2176-Extractions

Precious Peeps Pits Perfect here to help you holler over the hump.

Surprise surprise I am in the dog house.

See while granny was baking I got busy upstairs.

I’d heard the Olympics in the city of light were “termine” so I decided Dad no longer needed his pretty pillow that said PARIS!

It was doing my civic duty as a citizen of the USA to prepare for LA so I eliminated all traces of PARIS.

Granny was not well pleased when she found my handiwork but in picking up the stuffing she had a close encounter with the dust between the bannisters so I did her a favor in getting that taken care of.

Aren’t I just the sassiest sister, so stinking smart.

Blessing#2175-Shaking Up

Dear reader this is not a joke.

Our quiet little corner of Ohio has a big bad issue.

A coyote with a pup was spotted on a door camera a few days ago.

A killing of a fawn was then reported.

Add to this the fawn auntie Denise found dead two houses up from us three weeks ago and we all start to get a bit spooked.

The icing on the cake if you can call it that was this apparition in my pal Remingtons yard yesterday morning.

Now friends that is one seriously large coyote and if my eyes are not mistaken I’d say it’s mother may have been up close and personal with a wolf.

So we are all looking out for each other and have been informed by the authorities if we encounter the wild ones face to face to “make noise”

Please inform Dad that I’m practicing if you hear him complaining

Blessing#2174-Beneficial Barking

It was an unusual Sunday because Ma went out.

She usually vegetates after Church and we have a nice nap before a lengthy stroll.

Yesterday she went to see a musical show called RENT at the Palace Theatre in Marion.

It was performed by a local cast but she said they were like broadway stars.

She was away for a very long time and I was sad.

Fortunately the Bro was off so we could hang out with him and he did “job” duties but he has no interest in walks.

I’m glad Ma is usually a stay at home sort and not one who galavants like some girlies or I could get very chunky.

Blessing#2173-One Offs

When the Bro returned from work on Friday night Ma informed him of my misdemeanor.

Oh course he was initially irritated that I had pricked the Pitty.

He got over it quickly though.

Not one to bear a grudge is the Bro.

He too looses it sometimes with his daughter especially when she nukes his pillows and pants.

Secretly I sense he even appreciates my endeavors to keep her in check

Blessing#2172-Recognition

I’ve been in the dog house.

When I returned from the groomers on Thursday Ma took me and the niece for a trot.

Truth be told she was showing off my posh new hair cut that cost ten times more than hers!!!!

We met a neighbor at the school bus stop and the niece was all over him like a bad rash.

He was patting and pampering her and it was just more than my shattered nerves could bear.

Being at the groomers is exceedingly exhausting and this just tipped me over the cliff.

So I tore into the terror and inflicted two small incisions in her innards.

You would have thoughts I’d committed murder.

Ma didn’t speak to me for FOUR HOURS until the niece started chasing me round the living room and was clearly restored to her painfully “Pittiness”

I am now forgiven but my reputation is in tatters.

I really am a decent dog this is just another example of the injustice inflicted on me by this interlocutor!

Blessing#2171-Raw Hide

Precious Peeps Pits PERFECT here to propel you into the most wonderful weekend ever.

It really started for me yesterday when Granny threw the Gizz in the car and took off!

I wasn’t even a tad jelly as I knew where he was going; the groomers.

He hates it and it gave me the greatest delight knowing how miserable he would be. For him it is comparable I guess to the Trump team watching the DMC!

The Gizz you see needs groomed because unlike me he was born ugly not perfect.

His stinking coff gets matted and smelly like the tatty old mongrel he is.

I on the other hand remain sleek and shiny all year round.

Oh how wonderful it is to be beautiful.

There is no one, not even Kamala, although she is tough competition, quite like me!

Blessing#2170-Shiny Stat

Ma and Auntie Paula have got a big new fancy sign for their shops.

They are praying it helps them drum up more business as they should be more visible to passing traffic.

I’m hoping it works as Ma will have more money for treats.

She’s taking me to see it today as I’m getting my long awaited short back and sides at the groomers before it heats up again.

I think the sign looks fab but I’m a bit miffed that Woodford, Miss Paula’s puppy features and I don’t.

I understand that canines are not usually associated with tea paraphernalia but I’m just saying that I’m very helpful in the kitchen when it comes to conducting quality assurance on scones and such.

Oh well I’ll forgive the old gal if she agrees to share a super Scooby snack.

Blessing#2169-Marketing Momentum