Booming Banter

Last Sunday when the parents went to Aldi for our weekly shopping Butterballs we’re on offer for 49 cents a pound.

So Ma being a lover of both turkey and bargains snagged an 18 pounder that thawed in our fridge this week.

Since it was the end of the Chinese new year we cooked it yesterday.

We tried something different than our usual cooking method. We salted it well, threw it in uncovered on roast at 350F for an hour until the skin got all crispy and then turned the oven to bake at 300F for three hours while we had our siesta and a trot.

PERFECTION. Norman Rockwell picture perfect if we say so ourselves.

We took photos as Turkeys play an important role at the White House and we plan to approach both Aldi and Butterball with a promotional deal for my campaign.

Just as we were admiring our work and Ma was taking her Nigella Lawson pose by the stove to make the gravy disaster struck.

She had carefully poured the juices into the pot and was adding corn flour when the packed slipped from her hand, hit the handle of the saucepan and both cornflour and warming turkey juice went flying everywhere including over her and me.

What a mess but I never smelled so tasty.

Took us almost as long to clean up as it did to roast the critter.

So much truth in that saying « pride comes before a fall »

Blessing#1606-A Well Rested Bird

Precious Perps it PITS Perfect. Didn’t that give you a pleasant surprise for Sunday!

I have been forgiven for my transgressions by Dad not sure about Grandpa he is prejudiced by my breed.

Granny and Auntie Paula have been so busy with their big February event these past days that poor old Gran was past caring.

She was working her little fingers to the bone making tiny treats and serving afternoon tea not to mention washing mountains of dishes that she’s ready to look the other way no matter what I chew up.

She was so late home last night that Dad had to take us out for our trot.

So I told her to relax and chill. I’m such a great therapist!

We gals gotta stick together and put our best fashion feet forward.

Maybe I’ll get to be in the show next year if I play my card right!

Blessing#1605-Girls Days

Precious Peeps it’s PITS. I’m still PERFECT!

First Lady, why not? Provided I can retain the Princess title too.

At this moment in time, while Scooby may be endearing himself to me, Dad is furious.

See what happened was he got me and the Grumpy Gizz new Nylas because I had reduced the others to a size where Granny was concerned I could soon swallow one.

He gave us our goodies and I got to chew the new for a while before we adjourned to bed.

Well yesterday morning when he left for work I was desperate to get out of our bedroom and down to my fresh bone.

Granny, as usual, ignored my scratching until SHE was caffeinated and ready to go out to meet Auntie Denise for our trot.

So I got a little frustrated and decided to have a PITTY pillow fight with myself.

Well when you get a little hole in those feather lights it’s such fun. Blizzard babes just like playing in the snow.

They are scattered everywhere. Maybe I’ll make a boa with them for functions.

In the meantime I’ll keep a low profile

Blessing#1604-Duck Down

As my journey towards election begins I am conscious of the need to network and socialize.

This is not my favorite chore. I find it rather dull and boring.

I’m an aloof sort of dude.

A deep thinker and an introvert unlike my niece who is keen to slobber all over everyone.

Maybe I should take her as my running mate.

Nepotism I fear might be frowned upon.

Maybe my First Lady.

After all there is president for that. It will keep her happy and after all she does look good in a hat.

Blessing#1503-Socialites

Ma says that if you grew up in the UK in the sixties and someone mentions the number 1001 you immediately think of dry foam.

The TV advertising music is imbedded in every mind as deeply as the dirt the miraculous product claims to shift.

There will be a few of you swearing right now because you know you’ll be singing or humming the 1001 song all day long and people will be giving you strange looks.

Fear not I will close my eyes and turn the other cheek and take no offense. Being blasted is power for the presidential course.

The product it would seem is still around.

We might just go find some as you know who is always making mess.

They might also provide some funds for my campaign after all every home with a canine needs power cleaning even a White House.

Maybe I’ll see if their producers of script and score are still in the land of the living. We’ll need a good catchy tune for our spots.

Blessing #1602-Jingles

Can you imagine I’ve been on the Banter for a THOUSAND DAYS! Takes you way back to May 2020 if you need help with your sums.

When I look back to that point in time I was no more than a kid. Still smart but innocent.

As I turn this milestone of a page I can reflect on many adventures and different looks. Through it all I’ve always been myself!

I helped Ma walk her way through a pandemic, helped Dad recover from bouts of illness, started our business, seen the bro change jobs about ten times and of course been mentor to a mighty mad dog.

I’ve endured it all with strength of character and courage and on most occasions have retained composure.

Some Queens spent just this exact amount of time on the throne of England and they made movies about them.

Another good reason for me to be recognized, appreciated and elected to high office is this STAMINA!

Forward then dear followers let us make the next thousand days the most meaningful!

Blessing #1601-Mille Moments

It’s hard for me, as I’m so modest, to project my many characteristics that equip me so well for high office but they include

Enduring flexibility and creativity

Encouragement of all but especially the young to be adventurous

Compassion for those of weaker intellect capacity

Alignment with those whose values are rooted in tradition and the arts

Non discriminating, honest and just!

There that should secure me a little additional funding from the food sector. Now I must seek sponsorship elsewhere.

Suggestion other than Elon welcome.

Blessing#1600-Foodies Fix

The semifinals for the Super Bowl were on last night. Our Bengals almost made it but a field goal at the last minute meant Kansas City went through and will play against Philly. Not sure who well root for yet!

I was asking the bro if I might get a TV spot for my campaign

He says they are $7 million for thirty seconds so I may have to forgo and focus on social media for now.

For most people bologna is a lunchtime go to so I’m seeking breakfast endorsements too.

Maybe donuts.

Scooby a man with a big heart!

Or maybe fun food since it’s the year of the bunny. Shame about the egg. Very uppity!

Must take more photos. Get yours to me too.

Blessing#1599-Snaps

I’ve been working on my strategy and have reached the conclusion I need sponsors. Campaigns are costly and competitors for the Oval Office claim to have billions.

Pet food manufacturers would be too obvious and too polarizing.

That’s why I’m homing in on bologna.

My competitors may be metaphorically full of it but for me this is literal the case.

I eat this delight daily so I plan to seek sponsorship from this source.

We need a jingle along the lines of « a spoonful of sugar makes the medicine go down ».

What about « a bit of bologna bodes better than babble. »

Shows I’m a down to earth sort. Traditional values no oysters or fancy food for me.

Blessing#1598-Big Bucks

I’ve been working on my strategy and have reached the conclusion I need sponsors. Campaigns are costly and competitors for the Oval Office claim to have billions.

Pet food manufacturers would be too obvious and too polarizing.

That’s why I’m homing in on bologna.

My competitors may be metaphorically full of it but for me this is literal the case.

I eat this delight daily so I plan to seek sponsorship from this source.

We need a jingle along the lines of « a spoonful of sugar makes the medicine go down ».

What about « a bit of bologna bodes better than babble. »

Shows I’m a down to earth sort. Traditional values no oysters or fancy food for me.

Blessing#1598-Big Bucks