Booming Banter

Today is special because the bro passed his final maths test and the vaccine took off. Miraculous!

Ma said we must mark the occasion with a surprise cake for the bro when he gets home from work.

Wouldn’t you think that a woman with a Degree in Food Science would be able to make one?

NO!

Even though she watches the Great British Bake Show every week and their masterclass as well she still messes up because she’s always cutting corners!

Some people like Laura, with help from little Luna, make cakes that look like they should be in a cookery book.

They inspire my ma to try. Only problem is she tries to make a cake with a kit destined for cup cakes.

I smelt a rat and I was right! It came out like a pancake.

The sticky crumb stuff went in my crunchies which was a perk though!

The frosting, which is thicker than the cake, is happily hiding a multitude of sins.

The bro won’t care. He’d eat anything. Come to think of it so would I.

Blessing # 908 – Icing Up

Mother almost forgot to come home. She’s given me no attention today at all.

I’m feeling miffed.

It was almost dark by the time I got out for the evening ablutions.

She didn’t even think of me first she was all concerned because one of her big balls had fallen off the tree so we had to fix that first.

Clearly she had not got her priorities right.

Benefit of that later outing though is that you do get to admire the fairy lights.

The old heavenly ones weren’t bad either. The one upstairs sure can put on a great show

Blessing # 907 – Twilight Twirl

I had a shocking experience today. Nearly fainted!

My beloved Pinkie suffered an injury.

I brought the wounded one to Mum.

She started poking him with a big pin. He never so much as squeaked.

She then gave him back to me and the two holes in his little body where his innards were coming out weren’t there anymore.

She said he needed a good rest and maybe, at some stage, a good wash.

So I’m taking care of him while he rests and recovers and we’ve all just had a good nap. Restored for the wonders of weekend ahead!

Blessing # 906 – Needlework

High energy in the Ma today. She had the urge to keep going so I encourage that as it usually results in a treat.

After our walk she started on her candle making. She collects all these little bits over the year and then makes a few « memory candles » for her nears and dears. They are most peculiar looking all mixed up colors but say nothing if you get one. Just pretend it’s « interesting »

What better day to make them though than Hanukkah. She kept one for herself because it sorta backfired. We all need a little light so why not.

After the candles she took to the cookies. Dad had suggested going to Gordon’s the foodservice store and buying those frozen ones that you stick in the oven and wait. The bro had another opinion he said he’d rather have Ma make them. So of course this made her smirk.

He’s not stupid that lad. She smothered a whole stack of them in chocolate just for him and left him a variety plate for his return from work. They are gigantic! Meal in a munch!

Of course I can’t complain because she made me some little ones too minus the brown stuff. They were good!

I could get used to this festive season if it wasn’t for all these songs she insists on playing as does her stuff.

Even poor Dad got fed up with Rocking Around the Christmas Tree. So we’re bantering to Light Classical. Not sure it’s any better. I’ll take the Rap!

Blessing # 905 – Lights and Not so Lights

It’s trash day so we were up before six to get it out.

Ma keeps our trash bags under the sink. When she went to get a new one we were horrified. What a stink!

The sink had sprung a leak and all this icky mucky stuff was everywhere. Totally putrid nearly knocked us out.

Poor soul had no choice but clean it up. I retreated to my chair and let her do it.

Put me right off my crunchies it did.

After she’d mopped all the yuck up with one of my big bath towels she had to throw it out such was the awfulness. That was the saving grace in the story she got rid of the mess immediately. Out it went with the rest of the trash.

After that was done I finally got to pee and she got a coffee. That restored her and she started fixing.

She was under that sink for an hour and a half dissecting the whole U-bend and bleaching. I was expecting some swearing but not a bad word was uttered.

Even after her third attempt the wretched thing was still leaking. Nothing for it but call the professionals.

They arrived in less than two hours and declared it to be a crack in the brass tube that comes from the dish washer. It was just a matter of wear and tear and nothing to do with the bro throwing bacon grease down the sink as Ma suspected. Just as well she hadn’t eaten the face of him!

So we are back in business and all is well. I have been released from my crate, where I had to go till those big men got out, and Ma is feeling very self righteous because she stayed calm and is now officially a DIY genius.

Blessing # 904 – Plumbers

My bro has been working very long hours. They are short staffed at both the cafe and the hotel.

I can’t remember the last day he was at home but today he has a day off.

That’s great because it spells BACON BURGER. When he has time he always makes it for his breakfast.

The whole house smells heavenly. He doesn’t skimp on the bacon and he fries it up good and crispy. Ever wonder why I love piggy so much? That’s the answer!

He shares with me so I help him with his studies.

He has his maths exam tomorrow which is not his strength. I’m not gifted either at geometry and algebra but I’m good on encouragement.

He appreciates my support, we really lift each other up.

Blessing # 903 – Reciprocity

It wasn’t too chilly this afternoon so Ma took me to the Sycamore trail.

It’s at the River Bluffs our closest Metro Park just two miles down the road.

I know my way around there now. It’s the place by the river where all the wild flowers grow in summer.

Right now the leaves have gone and so have the colors in the meadow. Mum says it sépia season and that I blend right in with that tone.

We always see something special on the trail.

It might be a tree with a spooky face.

It might be learning something new. Today it was the meaning of the word Irruption!

What was most surprising on this outing was that we happened on a little statute of two frogs on a motorcycle.

Explain that if you can.

We hope it’s a happy place where an engagement or wedding was held. What do you think?

Blessing # 902 – Secret Spot

The outdoor activities started this morning before I even got out for a walk.

The deer were out in force. A whole herd on the move.

They tease me my standing in our yard waiting for me to get them.

They know Ma won’t let me out to chase them.

It’s not a bit fair.

I was so annoyed with her I ate some of their poop when I did make a run for freedom.

She wasn’t pleased and left me with Dad for the rest of the day with the farewell word “if he pukes it’s his own fault”

Now she is back and has forgiven me and is all lovy dovy again. No kisses though!

They’ll be off limits for a few days.

Blessing # 901 – Stomach Acid

The best thing about Ma working on Saturday afternoon, especially when the Mall is very busy with Christmas shoppers, is that she’s in no mood for cooking when she comes home.

So she’s like « Heh Scooby let’s nip downtown and get some Chinese »

Once she puts in the order we go for a trot around the green. That’s one of my favorite places as it’s frequented by so many of my sort. They leave their calling cards on all the lampposts so it’s excites the old nose.

That gets it primed for the ride home with the bucket load of Chinese. The aroma in the car almost drives me into seven heaven.

I could eat every bite of that stuff. Pity I have to share with the family!

Always get my fortune cookie first. They are so crunchy and yummy. Why don’t pet food companies make treats like that!

Most important of course is the message that I always take to heart.

Blessing # 900 – Confucius

If things were normal the Pantomime season would be starting in theaters all over the UK.

Men would be dressed as ugly women and girls would be dressed as handsome princes. It’s a bit confusing.

If I was a starring I’d definitely be a the leading male! That might be a villain. Anyone say WOLF?

Most appropriate given my affection for piggies.

The bro now is no sleeping beauty but definitely an ideal candidate to be Aladdin.

His moustache is so long it’s curling at the ends. Could get in dumpling soup if you weren’t careful.

If the bro is Aladdin there’s only one thing Ma could possibly be and that’s not a Princess.

I’ll give you a clue. This lady runs a laundry and is Aladdins Mum! Sweet and ugly to boot!

Blessing # 899 – Old Dames