Booming Banter

This morning we overslept. Nearly missed the trash men and had to call Auntie Denise to say we were running late.

Just as well the mighty midget can wolf down her brekkie in thirty seconds. She eats so fast she get the hiccups which is kinda funny.

When we got back Ma had to have COFFEE as she is no good if not caffeinated.

The tike teased me mercilessly. She snuck under the coffee table and tried to retrieve her squirrel.

I just looked at her that’s all I need to do now to get her back in place.

She has developed a penchant for Dads trainers. Not quite sure what she sees in them because they are as ugly as sin.

Maybe it’s because he never wears them indoors.

Beware all ye who enter in henceforth shoe removal may result in a trip to the menders.

Blessing #1063-Cobblers

The bro brought his baby some new toys yesterday and I decided I deserved them more than she as I’ve been so accommodating.

I took a notion for the stuffed squirrel. So it’s mine. The squirt can borrow my pinky instead. Will match her collar!

She wants it all that little lady. Not only does she have MY crate in the bedroom she is now squatting in this monster mansion that’s meant to be mine.

She has also usurped my spot under the kitchen table at Dads toes.

I was compensated for my tolerance by Ma who just gave me a whole scrambled egg for my gentle nature! I’m still her main man!

Blessing#1062-Dealing

I thought I was in heaven this morning. It’s the bro’s day off as he and the teacup were sleeping I got Ma all to myself.

It was like old times no squirming little short leg to annoy me. You know what she did last night?

She actually squeezed herself into the shelf of our coffee table and then to make matters worse snuck up in my place beside Dad.

Ma was reading me her verse of the day.

She’s like « heh Scoob listen up to this »

I’m like take a dose of your own medicine Ma. You’re the one that’s always snapping.

She agreed and chilled and then we walked all the way around Cardinal Hill without tripping over the midget.

I’ll smack her one on the lips later.

Blessing #1061– Kisses

The teacup escaped from the palatial home the bro bought her so we’ve swapped housing units.

This is the most luxurious living you can imagine. Takes up half our kitchen. I might have to install a TV.

I’m back in the good books with Ma as I let the tike eat and drink from my bowls. I even shared a bev with her just now.

I have been good to her for nearly 24 hours.

In addition I am teaching her the ropes of sightseeing for bunnies and she is learning fast.

I feel better myself. No point in bearing grudges for too long.

Blessing #1060-Redeemed

I got myself in deep trouble last night. Ma was at work so when Dad gave me my dinner the teacup tried to eat it.

He’d put a lot of love into my meal like extra tasty bits. Don’t tell Ma that bit. Anyway the «thing » who aspirates rather than chews tried to get it. No way was I allowing that.

I jumped on her like she was pinky and I hurt her. All the other times I’d just frightened her. When Ma heard she said enough is enough. Sat her right up beside her on the sofa she did.

So this morning when I snarled she howled hard at me. Fierce woman and I had to watch « it » lick its lips.

Now I’m under strict surveillance and may be sequestered in solitary if I reoffend and don’t befriend.

Blessing #1059-Probation

This morning I was so happy. My Auntie Denise is back from California.

Of course the teacup had to come along on our walk to meet her.

We walked the paws of the niece and went all the way to the park. I was exceptionally well behaved. I ignored her completely and focused on Denise.

We stopped to talk to Betty who knows a lot about rescues and that’s when I lost it.

Betty was all over the teacup and I got jealous. Went for the neck and got scolded again.

Betty said it’s the terrier in me.

I said I’m still adjusting and it’s not fair at all that someone gets to eat my breakfast and go walking with MY MUM and MY AUNTIE and sleep on MY SOFA!

I was most contrite when I got home and lay snuggled with the teacup under the table till Ma left for work.

Blessing # 1058 – Repentance

Ma scolded me this morning as I was asserting my position of authority over my niece.

I went for her jugular but that’s what we need to do to make sure she understands who is top dog in this kennel. Well top dog among the canines. Ma is the head honcho!

So after nearly eating her I let her eat my breakfast and then we went out walking with Ma. The little tike did Good walked over a mile and did all her jobs too.

I licked her up nicely when we got home until she hid under the table where Dad was getting his treats ready.

That’s my place and little or not I’m the only one getting cookies. So I had another go at her and she snuck off upstairs to commune with the bro who was still in bed.

Blessing#1057– Hierarchies

This morning a whole slew of my Ma’s pals had birthdays. She sends them all a little Facebook message that eats into my walk time even though all see does is copy paste from one to another.

I just stand and wait and stare out the window and dream of my own birthday next month.

The funny thing is that two of these pals are Indian gentlemen some thirty years apart in age. They’ve never met. One is living in California and the other in South India.

Two others were pastors wives and their husbands had been pastors in the same church some twenty miles from where we live but twenty years apart in the time of their ministry.

What are the chances of these things happening and that they are all friends of Mums.

Ma said it must be an alignment of the stars and an auspicious day.

She left for work super early as she had a full house at midday. That shortened my walk even further.

While she’s delighted to see the parking lot completely full I have informed her I’ll be expecting a special treat on my trot this evening otherwise I’ll eat Nala and it won’t be such a happy day after all.

Blessing #1076– Cake and Candles

My niece is the size of a teacup but she can put away a bowl of food bigger than herself before I can nip her or say « that’s mine »

She cleans it all up too and leaves the bowl shining without the addition of any tempting morsels.

My fear is she’ll fall into the water bowl and drown.

When she’s done she licks her lips and looks at all of us as if she’s asking for more.

Give her her dues she is not fussy. If she goes on like this though you can be sure she will be a monster.

Blessing #1075– Vacuum

Poor Ma has had a wicked 24hours.

She was working at the Antique Mall yesterday and all was going great until a catastrophe occurred just before closing.

Someone move a glass plate and it knocked against some others. Nothing broke but when Ma went to stabilize the plate it slipped again. She got the plate but in the process three very expensive crystal glasses bit the dust.

She called the dealer and described what had happened and he was very gracious. Said that as long as no one was hurt that was the main thing. She still feels bad and sad.

If that wasn’t bad enough she got a message this morning to say there was a stain on the ceiling in the apartment above the tearoom. There had been a huge downpour yesterday and as you know it never rains but it pours when it comes to bad luck.

She is very down in the dumps so I am giving her intensive care now. I’m the best for that.

Let’s hope tomorrow brings some sunshine.

Blessing #1074-TLC